Musings from my sick bed
No video this week, unfortunately. I'm fighting off a cold or flu or false-negative COVID, but wanted to be in touch nevertheless to share some thoughts.
One of my favorite teachings in Buddhist philosophy is that all experiences can be approached as opportunities to wake up to the nature of reality. Or, alternatively, they can be a route to go further to sleep. I try to remember this teaching whenever I deal with difficulty, big or small.
Yesterday, for example, was "that day," The one on which all the errands I'd procrastinated on and finally was trying to do, for one reason or another, could not be completed. I was standing at one CVS while my prescription was sitting at another, the Post Offices internet was down (cash only? what year is this?), an important appointment that required a lot of calendar reorganization got changed at the 11th hour. I could feel myself tightening up, thinking "why me?," until I looked outward, away from myself and toward the others around me - the pharmacist, the folks working at the PO, the doctor who got sick. It stopped being me v. the world and just US.
Today, when whatever virus this is really hit, I realized how long it's been since I was sick, how much energy I usually have, how much I get done and enjoy. And I realized how difficult it is for me to NOT be productive, check off the list, tend to the needs of my body when they aren't scheduled. I'm hoping to take this experience to regularly express gratitude for my health every day, not to take for granted those productive days, and to give myself a lot of grace on the less productive days.
I hope there is something in these reflections that can be applied to your experience with Intuitive Eating and body image work. To remember to celebrate even the tiniest "noticings," to recognize progress everywhere you can, to rouse self-compassion on those tough days, to remember that this is the path you are on for the rest of your life and so you can both be right where you are and lean into your edge when it feels ok to do so. Basically I hope that you can use any and every experience you have with Intuitive Eating and body image work to wake up rather than to harden into self-aggression. Because you deserve that.